Every parent wants to ensure that their child makes the best decisions possible. As your teen matures, they will be faced with a number of important decisions. Teaching them the skill sets to handle these decisions in a positive way will prepare them to make effective and healthy decisions.
There is no handbook on raising a teenager that guarantees success every time. However, you can follow steps over time that lead your teen in the direction of healthy choices. Here are a few steps to guide you in helping your teen.
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1. Start With You
You will make mistakes raising your teen. The first step in helping your teen to make healthy decisions is to look in the mirror. Parents make a number of mistakes with their teens that impact the teen’s ability to make healthy choices. First, sometimes parents can expect the worst. And guess what? Teens will likely live up to your expectations. Focus on cultivating your teen’s hobbies or interests instead of analyzing what could go wrong.
Sometimes parents rely on books instead of their own instincts to guide their decision-making. And although books are good, everyone is different. Use your gut to guide you in the right direction for you and your teen. Also, parents can sweat the small stuff and ignore the big stuff. Learning the balance between what to address and what to let go is important.
And finally, parents can run the gamut of too much or too little discipline. Finding balance between these two can help your teen establish and develop problem-solving and leadership skills. Remember, you are the key to your teen’s capacity for healthy decision-making.
2. Promote Honesty
No one likes to be lied to, especially parents of teenagers. The perils of obfuscation and lies are apparent, particularly in the teenage years. Lies are typically mental defense mechanisms that a teen uses to protect themselves. Unfortunately, a pattern of this behavior can lead to drug addiction and other unhealthy choices. Establishing an honest relationship with your teen is paramount to fostering healthy choices.
3. Assess Each Alternative
Helping your teen evaluate each alternative choice can help them develop critical thinking skills that will serve them when making future choices. You can help them identify the pros and cons of each alternative and be there if they need to talk through any potential decisions. Some teens have problems seeing the big picture. Your guidance is crucial in helping them see and apply this big picture mentality.
4. Respect Your Teen
R-E-S-P-E-C-T — find out what it means to your teen. Fostering a respectful relationship can help your teen develop high self-esteem and self-respect. You can promote this respect by allowing your teen to have their own voice, giving and showing unconditional love, listening to your teen’s feelings and opinions, helping your teen set realistic goals, involving your teen in decisions that will impact the entire family, being open and talking to your teen and being supportive when your teen makes a mistake.
5. Allow Your Teen to Make the Choice
Allowing your teen to make the choice can be the most difficult part of helping your teen through this process. As a parent, you have maintained a level of control over your child’s choices and activities. Once your child reaches a certain age, this level of control diminishes. Giving your child the green light to make choices tells them you trust and respect them and their opinion matters.
When your teen makes decisions (or mistakes), remember to continue to show respect. Make sure to speak faithfully about your teen’s choices to show you trust them. Support them through the choices — don’t stress them. And finally, keep in mind that mistakes are small steps that bring your child closer to success.
Even if your teen is near-perfect — and we all like to think they are a chip off the old block — they will likely make mistakes. We all do. Helping them learn from mistakes so negative behavior patterns are not established promotes making healthy choices. Your presence matters to your teen, so remember to guide them through these choices, but do so with balance and love.
Sarah Landrum is a freelance writer and blogger with a passion for party planning and living life to the fullest. Get advice on having a happy, successful career on her blog Punched Clocks, and swing on over to Twitter to follow her @SarahLandrum
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Danielle is the owner of Today's the Best Day. She strives to provide creative and uplifting content in order to enrich the parenting experience for women everywhere. Danielle hopes to help you and your family to make every day the best day! 
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