6 Simple Steps To Love Yourself

A young girl wakes up every morning, hoping to find that best friend that she has always dreamed of spending her life with, wondering if she will ever find love.

A wife cries all day, trying to find happiness in her marriage, wondering what she should do in her relationship.

A new mom stays up until the wee hours of the morning, singing songs to her fussy baby, wondering if it is even worth it.

And a woman kneels by her bed at night, praying to find peace through a hard trial she never wanted to face, wondering how she will ever find happiness again.

Each of us as women fight hard battles. We each have our trials, our struggles and our very own terrible, horrible, no good, very bad days. With so many responsibilities as wives, moms, friends, neighbors and employees – often times we get lost in the busyness and forget the most important person: ourselves.

Now, that may sound extremely selfish and self-centered to some… but it is truth. How can you take care of a child, if you aren’t happy with being a mom? How can you love your husband, if you aren’t happy with being a wife? How can you serve others and be a good friend, if you aren’t happy with yourself?

Loving yourself can be one of the hardest people to love. We get down on ourselves and notice every flaw. In fact, most of the time, we see flaws in ourselves that others don’t even see!

Photo by Christine Olson

Today we have 6 Simple Steps To Love Yourself. These are important reminders on how to gain the confidence you need – so you can become the best you can be. And to find the love that you have always wanted to find in yourself.

STEP ONE: LOOK IN THE MIRROR. NOT AT ANYONE ELSE. JUST LOOK AT YOURSELF – Go stand in you bathroom or bedroom – it can be a small mirror or a full body – and take a look at yourself. Find three things that you LOVE about you. It can be physically, but it doesn’t have to be. Maybe you love your eyes. Maybe you love your hair. Maybe you love your smile. Maybe you love that your heart has good desires. Maybe you love that you know you are a good friend. Maybe you love that you have a special talent. Find the three things – and then write them down. Put these three things in a visible place that you will see often.

The second part of this step is to “not look at anyone else.” This means to stop comparing. If that means you have to get off Social Media for a bit – do it. If that means you have to remove yourself from certain people – do it. Don’t compare your life to others. I have been there and it only brought me sadness. Look in the mirror – focus on YOU and your life.

STEP TWO: FORGET THE PAST AND FOCUS ON THE NOW: Sometimes forgiving yourself can be really hard. Buddha said, “Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.”

So often you can dwell on your mistakes, misfortunes and wrongs from the past and even more often we can dream of the future and look forward to the “one days.” But for now – focus on TODAY. Take one day at a time. Decide what you can do NOW to bring you happiness.

STEP THREE: CARE ABOUT YOURSELF AS MUCH AS YOU CARE FOR OTHERS: Did you know that it is okay to say, “NO!” Often times as women, we always want to help others and be nurturers. But the person that deserves your love too, that you might be forgetting – is yourself.

I heard an amazing concept the other day that I absolutely loved. When you are in your home, take care of yourself. Get ready, look your best, dress nicely, exercise, do what you need to do to make yourself feel good. Then, once you walk out the doors, forget yourself and  take care of others.

This leads us to STEP FOUR: DO SOMETHING FOR SOMEONE ELSE: I know SO many of you women that are reading this right now – do TOO MUCH for others. You are always serving. You are always reaching out a hand. You are always doing something for someone else! And that is why you need to remember Step #3 about saying “NO!” sometimes. 🙂

But this step is for people like me. The person that sometimes gets so wrapped up in my own busy schedule, I forget about taking care of other people around me. I know from experience that as we do something kind for someone else – we will feel better about ourselves. As we serve others, we can experience the greatest joy, knowing we made someone else feel happy! For creative ideas on how to serve, check out this incredible blog: Let’s Do Some Good Today.

STEP FIVE: STOP TRYING TO BE PERFECT: You may have to lower your expectations a little – because sometimes we just can’t do EVERYTHING. Life can be stressful, especially if we are trying to please everyone.

I have always wanted everyone to like me – but have learned {Especially after throwing myself into the internet world where people are vicious!} that you really can’t please everyone. There are going to be the haters. There are going to be the fakers. Don’t focus on them – believe in yourself and know that you can do anything and become anything you want to become.

STEP SIX: BE PROUD OF WHO YOU ARE: It is easy to shut down and hide. It is easy to lay in bed and not want to ever come out. But the last step to loving yourself is to take PRIDE in who you are. Your experiences, trials and mistakes have made you who you are today! Take pride in that and carry on.

I heard a quote once: “Sometimes the strongest women are the ones who love beyond all faults, cry behind closed doors and fight battles nobody knows about.”

You never know who is struggling. Sometimes the happiest people are the women that are having the hardest time. Let’s not wait until they reach out and ask us for help – let’s reach out to them before they know they even need it.

The most important thing to remember is that it is NEVER too late to change. We can always love ourselves – no matter how hard we have been on ourselves in the past. Through these six simple steps, each of you will be able to love yourself a little more and find the joy that each of you deserve.

Now, go back to step one and take a look at your piece of paper – add three more things you love about yourself and do it all over again. It is a never ending cycle. One day, you will have little pieces of paper all around your house with all of the positive things about yourself on them. And you won’t be able to help – but to love yourself.

Don’t forget to share this with the women in your life! –

Danielle is the owner of Today's the Best Day. She strives to provide creative and uplifting content in order to enrich the parenting experience for women everywhere. Danielle hopes to help you and your family to make every day the best day!

January 11, 2016 by Danielle Davis | 5 Comments