Annnnnd they are finally asleep!
Our little family recently expanded and as we welcomed our little new buddy into the gang, my wife and I quickly realized that our life has forever changed.
The regular routine of tag teaming bed time with just one kid was amazing for years, but came to an abrupt halt as 1am feedings left us both exhausted and longing for bed time at the end of the day.
After trying to catch up on sleep and setting up schedules to switch off night time shifts with the baby, we both had a moment where we realized that we missed one thing….us.
With work, chores, making dinner, going to family events, doing homework and everything else that gets packed into our few hours together at night, it often felt like a blur as we raced towards bedtime.
One night, we sat together and we decided that even though we knew we’d be tired in the morning, that we would spend time together to remind ourselves that WE still matter.
It was one of the most refreshing experiences to blow off bedtime and spend time together laughing and having uninterrupted adult conversations.
With that being said, we love our kids and cherish our time with them, but every now and again it’s important to remember the amazing benefits that come from choosing to stay up past your bedtime with your spouse.
Here are just a few of them:
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1. RECONNECTING WITH MY BEST FRIEND:
Through diapers and adult responsibilities we often neglect time to be together as husband and wife. Before marriage, we laughed and spent countless hours talking about our futures. Spending time together at night helps remind each of us that our friendship has been and always will be the foundation we continually build our marriage on.
2. TIME TO DISCUSS:
It’s no secret that we’re not all perfect. We all struggle with one thing or another. Whether your struggle is finances, behavioral issues or other stressful topics, the evening is a great time for us to talk about our struggles without having an audience. We don’t need our children to hear every discussion we have and so staying up gives us the time we need to discuss our family and how we can improve together.
3. LIGHT AT THE END OF THE DAY:
Getting through the day is always so much easier when you have something to look forward to at night. When we stay up together we love to watch shows that we both love. It reminds me of the days when we were dating and we’d do anything just to cuddle and watch a movie. Though we may fall asleep during the movie these days, it is always what I look forward to the most when I am having a tough day.
4. CELEBRATING INTIMACY:
Yes, you know you were thinking it. Kids need to not dissolve this area of our lives together. Sure, we can always be too tired or have a headache, but making time to be intimate shows your spouse your dedication to them and has many fringe benefits. We’re healthier (it’s science), we feel closer together and we often laugh more and argue much less.
5. PRIORITIZING OUR TIME:
I was once told that if someone took an objective look at my time they could tell a lot about what is most important to me. At the end of my life, I don’t want someone to say I spent time sleeping or hanging out on my phone. Spending time at night together gives purpose to our time and we show each other that WE are what is most important to US.
6. HELPING HANDS:
With me at work most of the day, I often times don’t get the chance to help support my wife as she runs our home. Spending time at night together to clean the house may not be ideal when we are both exhausted but she sees me making an effort to help her and I am able to alleviate her of some of her struggles for the following day. We both recognize that the other is there to put in 110% to support each other.
7. PUNCH BOREDOM IN THE FACE:
Ever feel like you’re stuck in the same schedule day in and day out? I definitely do. Even if we have to schedule in time for fun, it needs to happen. We need to break up the routines we fall into and laugh and joke and play games..fun matters. Even if it’s only for 30 minutes at night, we smile more the next day when we have fun together at night.
8. INTENTIONALLY GOING THE EXTRA MILE:
One night after the kids went to bed, I came downstairs to find my favorite candy and my favorite movie waiting for me… and I was thrilled. My wife had gone out of her way on a particularly stressful day to plan our time together and made the night about my favorite things. Her example of intentionally showing me how important I am to her even on a rough day helped me see how important it is to not only show up for our spouse, but go the distance for them because they are that special to us.
9. INVESTING TIME IN US:
Our marriage is not perfect but it is ours and it is worth fighting for. Each day brings us new opportunities to choose us. Taking a few extra minutes at the end of every day to invest in our marriage will only make us stronger over time. It may not be easy to do, but that is exactly why it is so worth doing. When we invest in us we choose to have a happier future together for us and for our whole family.
So tonight – put your phone away and kiss bedtime goodbye. Because spending some one on one time with the person you love the most is way more important than…well…anything else.
Tyson is a contributing writer to Today’s the Best Day. He is a husband to his High School Sweetheart and father to the most beautiful girl on the planet. He loves, football, spending time with family and providing valuable content to help others have the best day every day.
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Danielle is the owner of Today's the Best Day. She strives to provide creative and uplifting content in order to enrich the parenting experience for women everywhere. Danielle hopes to help you and your family to make every day the best day! 
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