I always love when my husband guest posts for me. I love everything he says! I would like to preface this article today by telling you all what an awesome dad, Laila has. For many years, I gave up on trying to become a mom. I thought we were destined to never have a baby at times. I remember being so angry and telling him to just stop thinking it was going to happen, because I knew getting pregnant was impossible. BUT – Tyson always had faith. He always knew he was going to be a dad. He always knew that we would have a baby. He always knew that miracles happened. Not ONCE did he ever give up or show me anger. As you all know, he was right. We became parents! So today, he shares with all of us, what he wants his miracle girl to know. Take it away Tys:
I was 25 years old when I first became a dad. My wife and I had been trying for years to make our little family grow. There were lots of highs and lows, but nothing would prepare me for the pure joy that fatherhood would bring into my life. When I held my little princess in my arms for the first time and she looked up at me I knew right then and there that we were automatically best friends. Sadly, at the same moment I realized she was mine forever, I also knew that eventually someday, some juvenile delinquent was going to come to MY house and take her on a date. Believe me, I’m not thrilled about this idea. If I had things my way she’d be a big strong ox who is drafted as the first female NFL player with hair so long on her legs that it sticks out of her socks. Seems like a reasonable request right? I think so. However, in our talks about the future, my wife reminds me that eventually one day Laila is going to grow up and I need to prepare myself for that day so I’m not “that dad.” To some degree, I am sure that is true, but while I am still super dad for the next 15 years, I plan on making sure she is armed with the tools she needs to successfully find someone that will respect her for the princess that she is. I give to you 10 things I want my daughter to learn before dating.
Photo cred to Ms.Family Photo
10. Just because he has a smart phone doesn’t mean he’s smart: That saying came from a recent conference that our church had and I think there is a lot of wisdom in it. I can’t tell you how many times I have walked into a room of teenagers and they’re all “plugged in” and missing out on life. I will encourage my daughter to date someone who is interested in her and not in how many likes his recent picture of his cat wearing a mustache has on Instagram.
9. If he’s on Tinder, he ain’t a winner: I’m not really read up on the whole fascination with Social Media and dating. That is especially true when it comes to Tinder. Though this (as I call it “super sketchy”) app came around long after I exited the dating scene I have heard much about it. What I do know for sure is that there are a lot of “creepers” out there. The world of internet dating can be a hard one and I am sure many have found success there. For my daughter though, I hope she will avoid the dating world of meeting faceless individuals on apps and avoid getting “catfished.”
8. You always deserve better: Personal worth is something that I have seen deteriorate a lot in society. Settling for someone that could someday become someone that you may or may not be able to have a successful relationship is a waste of her time. I hope my daughter can know that she deserves someone who is honest, stalwart and trustworthy. Though no one is perfect and we all have things we can improve, I hope she knows that a boy with standards that respects her is someone worth going to get ice cream with.
7. You are beautiful: Self confidence is a hard thing to teach. We live in a world of bullying that reaches the inner most feelings of every young person in new and ugly ways. Cyber bullying and old fashion “haters” at school is something I worry about daily. As a father I hope I can shield her from these people and help her understand that beauty truly does come from the inside. I hope I can instill in her self confidence that will help her leap over the hurdles of teenager-hood and find success in all aspects of her life.
6. Have Fun: This is one of the most important things about dating. When I first started dating I would always try to date in groups of friends. We would have contests to see who could come up with the most creative and funtime for us and our dates. After all, striving to have fun and find someone you can enjoy spending time with is what dating is all about.
5. Remember who you are: I remember years back when a dad who became an internet sensation was feeling offended by the disrespect his daughter showed him online. He took her laptop into the back yard and shot it with his 45. I couldn’t believe he went to such lengths to teach his daughter a lesson. As a dad now, I kind of get why he did. He wanted to instill a life lesson that would help his daughter understand the gravity of her decisions. When dating there are so many things that can happen that have life altering consequences. Choosing who you surround yourself with ultimately reflects on who you are as a person. I won’t be as dramatic as the dad I mentioned, but I hope I have done my job as a father so that my daughter knows how important it is to stay true to herself and when making choices, to remember who she is and where she came from. Doing this will help her avoid the pains of costly mistakes.
4. Nothing Good ever happens after midnight: My parents used to hammer this into me time and time again. I used to roll my eyes and say “sure mom, sounds good.” As I have gotten older it has turned out that (like so many other things) my parents were exactly right. Curfews will definitely be a thing that is strictly enforced in our house. I am sure my daughter will squeeze out every second she can, but it’s because I love her and want her to be safe that her potential prince charming will have her home on time and safe.
3. Modest is the Hottest: It seems as time has gone on fashions have strived more and more to push the envelope and sell the notion that the more skin you show, the more guys will like you. One of the greatest things about my wife is that when we dated she understood this couldn’t be further from the truth. She always tells me that the way I dress reflects how I view and feel about myself. She is wise. A girl who confidently understands that being modestly dressed shows her desire to be above lowering herself just to get a guy to look her way.
2. Laugh: One of my favoritest things about my wife is how she can make me laugh no matter where or what we are doing. When we were dating I was amazed at the light that she brought into the eyes of anyone she talked to. I knew that no matter where we went or what we did on a date, I would have fun because of the smile she would bring to my face. I hope my daughter understands the importance of laughter and doesn’t date Debbie Downers. Life is too short.
1. I loved you first: Ultimately, I know that I will have some influence on the boys that come over to our house. I will work hard to let them know that I have a shotgun and a shovel ready at a moment’s notice and I am not afraid to return to prison lol. No matter what happens in her dating life, I hope she always knows how much her dad loves her. Guys will come and guys will go, but her dad will always be around thinking of the days of Bubble Guppies and Frozen. I will be there to hold her and wipe her tears and to jump around celebrating her successes. Whatever comes her way, she will always be my princess.
Photo cred to Art By Design LV and Quote by Heartland “I Loved Her First”
Do you have a list of things you would share with your daughter about dating? Share a few in the comments section below!
Do you love your daughter or hope to have one in the future? Please, don’t forget to share! –
Kristina
May 19, 2014 at 1:42 pm (10 years ago)This is so adorable!
Vidya Sudarsan
May 19, 2014 at 4:56 am (10 years ago)Oh! Such a nice post! Loved it 🙂
katherine
May 18, 2014 at 8:00 am (10 years ago)The most beautiful post about a little girl ever
Rena (An Ordinary Housewife)
May 18, 2014 at 2:51 am (10 years ago)Such a sweet post! I know DH feels the same way about our daughter. I love the pic at the end too!
amanda @attachedmoms
May 18, 2014 at 2:42 am (10 years ago)Great guest post. I think teens can be blind sighted but with family support it can be easier
Michelle F.
May 17, 2014 at 5:59 pm (10 years ago)That is such awesome advice and so well said.
Jenn @comebackmomma
May 17, 2014 at 4:14 pm (10 years ago)Fantastic advice. I am going to share this post with my daughter.
Rosey
May 17, 2014 at 3:29 pm (10 years ago)All perfectly wonderful tips! And with a teen daughter in the house, I have to say I agree with all of them. We’re always going around and around about the ‘modest is hottest’ thing. For some reason shorts on racks in the mall keep getting shorter and shorter and while she thinks it’s a good thing, I think uh no. I’ve hidden shorts that were a gift to her before. I have no shame. 😉
Loved your post!
LaDonna Dennis
May 17, 2014 at 2:10 am (10 years ago)Absolutely beautiful! Good for you dad, too often parents forget to “teach” some of the most important things. Sending our kids to school teaches them some things, the rest is up to the parents!
MoxiesGroovyMom
May 17, 2014 at 1:35 am (10 years ago)“Modest is the hottest” yes! love that!
Amberly
May 17, 2014 at 1:30 am (10 years ago)This is SO cute!!! 🙂
Renee @ Two in the Kitchen
May 16, 2014 at 11:40 pm (10 years ago)Oh my goodness! This was such a PRECIOUS read!! Your hubby does good work Danielle!!! 🙂
Annette Belnap
May 16, 2014 at 11:33 pm (10 years ago)What an adorable post. I love the “I loved her first” quote picture at the end. Great tips.