Oh my heart today. May 17th is a date I will aways remember. 🖤
Two years ago i was laying on a doctor’s ultrasound table holding my husband’s hand super tight. And i was shaking.
To be honest…I was scared. SUPER scared. I hate thinking about the unknown and the anticipation as to what was coming was making my nerves go ca-ray-zeeee!
You see, we had been working with their office for 5 months, trying to prepare my body for InVitro. And if you aren’t familiar with the IVF process, it takes MONTHS of shots, needles, pills, ultrasounds and other medications to prepare your body for “implantation day.” Implantation day is the actual day they place an embryo inside of you, in hopes it will attach to your uterus and continue to grow a baby.
I got a call the night before from my doctor who said i needed to come into the office first thing in the morning because they needed to look inside of my uterus. Unfortunately, my body had completely stopped responding to my IVF shots and the implantation day of our baby that we had spent the past few months working on with the doctor had to be cancelled. In fact, not only was my body not responding to the medications anymore – my body was doing the complete OPPOSITE of what they wanted it to be doing!
The only reason my levels would be acting this way – “is if something was in the uterus. Possibly a tumor or cyst we will need to remove,” I heard on the other side of the phone.
After ALL of this?! After MONTHS of appointments, prayers, shots, ultrasounds and pills – dedicating ALL of my heart and soul and time and money into making this baby – we are canceling our implantation day and I now have a tumor?!
I was a mess.
My stomach and bum were bruised from the daily shots we had been working on. My veins in my arms were weak from being poked at and drawn blood from almost every morning. My heart was heavy. And i was destroyed.
As i laid on the ultrasound table waiting for our tech to come in – my mom and dad called. It was about my grandma. She had passed away. As if this day couldn’t get worse… my beautiful, loving, smart, honest, funny grandma had left this earth. And i cried some more.
“WHY am I getting this phone call while laying here getting ready to see if I have a tumor inside of me?!” I thought to myself. Like WHYYYYY is this happening?! And why is it happening all at once?!
But then everything changed…VERY quickly.
The ultrasound tech came in and i swear it was no more than two seconds of her placing the camera on my belly she looked up at me and said…“
You do have something in your uterus!
But it’s not a tumor…
…IT’S A BABY!!!
With a heartbeat!!
Measuring SIX weeks!”
Wait. What?!
….Like WHAT?! This isn’t possible.
They had been checking me at almost DAILY check ups. We had been giving me shots and pills for months. It wasn’t possible…no stinkin’ way possible… but the impossible HAPPENED!
My tears. My emotions. My brain. I couldn’t handle it all! If I can explain it in any way – I would say it was a complete roller coaster. Within 30 minutes – I had a tumor, my IVF was cancelled, my grandma passed away, I didn’t have a tumor…annnnd I was pregnant!
Just thinking about it brings back all the feels.
How amazing is it to KNOW that even the IMPOSSIBLE can happen to ANY of us! That ANYTHING can happen! I promise if this has happened to me – miracles can and WILL happen to YOU too.
It’s my hope that through this experience we can all remember to NEVER lose hope – and to remember who is in charge… God.
My mom texted me the night before this all happened and i was so upset. Through the tears and fears I read my phone that said, “You can have what you want… or you can have something BETTER!”
She had no idea what the next day was going to hold – but God knew. And what i wanted to happen was NOTHING compared to the blessing that was just around the corner.
Every time I look at my little miracle boy – I think of my Grandma. I think of the timing of everything happening at once and how it was all a part of HIS plan the entire time.
I wanted to have a baby. I wanted to implant the baby on May 18th. I wanted it to be flawless. I wanted it to be my plan.
But HE wanted me to have a baby. And HE wanted to call my grandma home. But HE knew I wanted and needed to be at my grandmas funeral to say goodbye. Had I had it my way, I would have been on bed rest during my grandma’s funeral and had to have missed it, as i just implanted the baby.
But HIS plan was greater than mine. HIS was better. As one angel left this earth, another angel was created, a miracle baby, who reminds me every single day that HIS plan, is the BEST plan.
No matter where you are in your journey and trials…. PLEASE never forget…HE knows you! HE loves you! And you can have what you want…or you can have something BETTER!
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Danielle is the owner of Today's the Best Day. She strives to provide creative and uplifting content in order to enrich the parenting experience for women everywhere. Danielle hopes to help you and your family to make every day the best day! 
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