How To Support Your Husband In School

The “First Day of School” excitement happened in our home this past week. We were outside taking pictures and a neighbor was outside on a little walk. He stopped and said, “Oh she looks so cute! Back to school pictures, huh? Is she in Kindergarten?” Bless his heart – little did he know my child is ONE year old and NOT going to Kindergarten quite yet. Oh heavens – I would be BALLING if that were the case! No, she doesn’t get to go to school yet, she is stuck with me for few more years 🙂 – but someone special in our family gets to go… MY HUSBAND! And can I just say he looks way good doin’ it?! Obviously we had to take a first day of school photo shoot!

My husband and I have been in school for what seems like FOREVER. Our entire married life we have had to save money, go to school and work hard to provide for our family. Education has always been something that we have known is super important and our eyes have been on the finish line for a while now – and we can FINALLY see the light! Graduation is around the corner!

Not everyone can sail through college easily. School can be extremely expensive, a lot of stress and hard to complete. During our third year of marriage, my husband and I had a really hard time with infertility, which reflected on our marriage, which in return reflected on his grades. I wasn’t very supportive, I was extremely needy and I didn’t allow him to make school a priority. Because I {his wife – his cheerleader – his support team} failed at being the cheerleader and support that he needed, school was a challenge!

This is for the wife who is sending her husband off to his Freshmen year in college – what an exciting time! This is for the wife who is working hard and trying to stay focused for her husband who is in his last few semesters before graduation – the end is near! This is for the wife who is in the middle of medical, dental or law school and is having a hard time never seeing her husband – it will be worth it! This is for the wife who is taking care of three kids while her husband goes back to school to get his Masters – you can do hard things!

As the wives of these hard working men, it is our duty and responsibility to support and love them through this journey. I have learned from experience that as a wife, our attitude toward school can highly affect their success. They need us, ladies! In fact, they can’t do it without us!

Here is a little list of things you can do to help support your husband in school. Some are easy and some can be challenging, but I promise as you show love to him – he will be happy, successful and will be done sooner than later!

1. BE A SUPPORT: First things first – he needs to know that you are in this for the long haul. Encourage him to go to school and help with with his decision making. There are a lot of choices to be made when going to school: First, decide on a university, a college or online program. Second, decide on a schedule and what fits your family needs the best {before or after work, full-time or part-time, morning or night classes}. And third, help him decide what classes to take and what programs he will be most successful in.

2. GIVE HIM TIME TO STUDY: As a wife, sometimes we need some attention and it is hard to see our men get so busy and not be able to be with us as often. I highly suggest sitting down weekly with him and creating a schedule. Find out how school is going and ask how you can help him. At that time, take a look at your calendar and plan out what your family plan is for the week. If he studies best in the mornings, support him in waking up early to get it done. If he studies best in the library in the evenings, take care of things at home so he can do so. Create an atmosphere that he can get his work done without distractions.

3. SLIP LITTLE NOTES INTO HIS BOOKS AND BAGS: You know I am all about surprises and little acts of kindness. Sometimes it is fun to just randomly leave a note to tell him that you love him and are proud of him. {Sign up here for our Weekly Newsletter where you can receive FREE Printables like these weekly} Send him sweet text messages, sticky-note his card, show him that you love him. School can be stressful – but knowing he has a wife that loves him will make it a little easier to handle.

4. MAKE TIME FOR EACH OTHER: You have your schedule and he has his – and if you don’t schedule in “husband and wife time” things can get a little crazy. You may not be able to eat dinner together every night or even go to sleep at the same time, but try to create good habits in your marriage that help you grow closer together, even when you are busy. Making time for each other is important and both of you may need to sacrifice a little something to be sure you get that time in.

5. HAVE SCHOOL SPIRIT: “I’ve got spirit, yes I do! We’ve got spirit, how ’bout you?!” Buy a shirt {or make one} with his school name on it and wear it with pride! Go to a sports event together and cheer for his team! Sometimes the funnest dates are going to a basketball or football game. Often times, schools have student passes so it can be a super fun and cheap date! Maybe you will even get to kiss on the Jumbotron!

6. STAY WITHIN YOUR MEANS: Remember when I said school can be expensive? Let’s be honest – school can be VERY expensive. To show support to your man, help with your finances and create a budget with school specifically in mind. Don’t over spend and try to stay within the budget you make together. He will love seeing that his books are more important to you than a new dress {KILLS ME!! But is important}. Just remember, once he graduates – he will be making enough money for you to buy all the dresses you want… so it is worth it! 🙂

7. FAKE IT TILL YOU MAKE IT: I am not going to lie – sometimes life can be really hard without your man! ESPECIALLY if you have children and a family to take care of. Cut back on things when he is so busy. Know that you can’t do everything. Understand if the kids are alive by the time he gets home, you did a good job! Just keep pushing and keep going – act like you know what you are doing and that you can handle it all. You’ve got this!

8. DO SOMETHING YOU LOVE: Find something you like to do – and do it! While my husband does his homework, I like to blog! 🙂 It is good quiet time and we both can accomplish things at the same time. I have found if I am not busy and I just sit around and wait for him to get home or for him to finish his homework, I tend to be a little pest and ask him every five seconds, “Are you done yet?” or “When can you come be with me?” By investing in something else, not only will you let him do his thing, but you will feel accomplished too!

9. ENCOURAGE AND BE THE CHEERLEADER: You can never show too much support or show too much love. Don’t be afraid to let him know how proud you are of him. Keep your eye on the goal too – there is an end! School isn’t forever! It is all worth it. Be the person that he wants to come home to. After a long day, the last thing he wants to do is to come home to a nagging wife who has even more for him to do. Be happy and let him know you’ve got this.

10. KNOW THAT HE LOVES YOU: I saved this one for last because I honestly think it is the most important number of all. When your man is away all day from you and your family, it can sometimes be hard on your mind. You may start to think that he thinks school is more important than you. You may start to get angry because he is always gone and busy. You may start to get sad and miss him. But never forget the REASON he is going to school. He is doing this for YOU. He is doing this for your children. He wants to provide for you and he wants to be the best husband possible – THAT is why he is doing this. And trust me – he would much rather spend time with you than do homework all day and listen to lectures.

As a new school year approaches, now is the perfect time to show your support in his schooling and endeavors. Be the support to your husband that he needs. Be the best friend and cheerleader that he knows you can be.

It is worth it. One day he will put on a cap and gown and walk up on a stage. He will receive a piece of paper that not only says he studied and worked hard – but a piece of paper that says YOU did it. As the wife, YOU supported him! YOU helped him! YOU provided for him! And suddenly that paper isn’t just his… but both of yours.

Don’t forget to share this with your cute guy that is in school or your friends that are also on this schooling journey too! –

Danielle is the owner of Today's the Best Day. She strives to provide creative and uplifting content in order to enrich the parenting experience for women everywhere. Danielle hopes to help you and your family to make every day the best day!

August 27, 2014 by Danielle Davis | 7 Comments