“But Mom, I’m going to die, I am so thirsty!”
That was always my go to bedtime excuse when I was a kid.
My iron clad list of kid tested, mom approved, excuses always banked me an extra 20-30 minutes of time before bed.
I don’t know why I never enjoyed going to bed. I guess it just seemed altogether too boring. Why waste your life away sleeping when there is so much to be learned on prime time NBC?
Years later, the tables have turned and now, as the parent, I have a deeper appreciation for how truly annoying I was for my parents as a kid.
I am sure all they wanted to do was have just a few minutes of quite time to be together at the end of a long day. Just when they thought they were getting that, an all too familiar head would pop up begging for yet another glass of water before perishing from sudden drought like thirst.
My daughter is still young and I have been amazed how quickly she has picked up on my old techniques. They must have a class on bed time avoidance strategies on Sesame Street now or something because she’s pretty much a certified professional.
That being said, bed time is a hurricane of emotions which yields to exhaustion of toddler proportions.
I don’t consider myself a coward or an excuse generator, but last week I sat and talked with my wife about how we could team up to conquer our daughter, the bed time monster.
She pointed out to me that if we wanted to take back the night and overthrow the current two year old monarchy, I would need to stop trying to get out of bedtime and contribute to the cause.
I was taken back a bit. What did she mean I wasn’t contributing?
As I heard the words leave her mouth, I thought back to the previous weeks of bedtimes and I realized she was right. At the end of every night I would revert back to my thirsty days and try to avoid being the one to be in charge of bedtime.
It is embarrassing to admit, but here is a list of excuses I have used to get out of bed time and why all of them shouldn’t be used by me or dads anywhere from here on out.
1. “You can get her down faster than I can.”
It’s true, moms have skills that dads just don’t seem to have. She sets records with how quickly she can get the baby down. However, though it may take me longer, that is not necessarily a bad thing. Time together is so important and even though it might take longer for me to put our toddler to bed, that gives me more time sing the ABC’s and make crazy shadow puppets. You know, the kind of stuff you wish you could slow down time for and remember forever.
2. “You need to relax. You should go lay by her for a while.”
If you think laying down next to a toddler is relaxing you need to watch this video. It is anything, but relaxing. This excuse is one of the saddest out of my whole arsenal. What is relaxing about laying in a toddler bed or crib, getting kicked in the face and reading the same book over and over again? Our wives deserve some REAL relaxation. The type of relaxing where they get to have some quiet time to themselves while Super Dad takes care of business.
3. “I have other things to do.”
Dads are busy beings. We have school and work and projects and football and lots of important stuff. Realistically though, what is more important than your kids? Nothing. AND I am pretty sure our wives have a list of “other things” they could be doing too. When we tell someone we have more important things to do all they hear from us is, “this thing is more important to me than you are.” Put the other stuff on hold and man up.
4. “She thinks I am only there for play time. You comfort her more.”
It’s an awesome feeling when you walk in from work and you see their faces light up because daddy is home which means time to play. Whether it’s the tickle monster or the big bad dad that has the uncanny ability to run around for hours, dads are fun. Kids sometimes equivocate parents to roles. Mom = comfort, Dad = play time. I have definitely learned though that Dad can = comfort, especially from monsters under the bed.
5. “She needs more mom time.”
My wife is incredible and heck if I were my daughter I would choose to hang out with her more than me too. At the end of the day though, the one who really needs more mom time, is mom. A mother’s job is to get through the day while keeping everyone alive and as a father I need to make sure she has some time to unwind at the end of the day.
6. “I’ll clean up while you put her down real quick.”
This is a lucrative offer, but dishes will always be there and after putting the kids down it is always a good thing to not only do the dishes, but find at least one other spot in the house to clean too. I find brownie points are always earned when I try to go above and beyond.
7. “I’ve been at work all day, I need a few minutes of me time.”
Work is such a relative term isn’t it. Sure, filling out reports and making sales provides for my family, but my work day doesn’t end just because I come home. I simply am taking off one hat and putting on another as I walk in the door. I put down my brief case and pick up a wash cloth to clean the dishes. Just because we feel like we have been at work all day, doesn’t mean our wives haven’t been working all day too. Instead of working with paper and adults, they have just been working with cleaning products and little people.
8. “Seriously?”
I get it, we all have terrible, horrible, no good, very bad days where we don’t want to do anything, but check out. As Nyquil points out in this clever add though, we never get to call in sick or check out as parents. We are on call 24-7, 365.
9. “I was supposed to meet up with the guys.”
Friends are an important part of life. Keeping in touch and going out to have a good time is understandable. What many should consider though is how much time you spend away from your little best friends at home. Sure, they can be unruly and a bit crazy, but so can your buddies. Invest time in your relationships with your kids and later on in life you will have friends that will let you live with them when you are sporting depends.
10. “Come on, the game is on!”
Sadly, no matter how hard I have screamed at the TV or petitioned a referee’s bad call via twitter, I have never impacted an outcome of a game. Though my lucky socks and jersey, which I have to wear in front of the tube while the game is on to keep my superstitious fantasy streak alive are important, they can wait. I have learned DVR is a great addition to my life and as I utilize it I can spend more time being a dad.
When all is said and done, being a parent has all kinds of responsibilities that come along with it. Those who are “buffet” parents and only show up for the parts that they enjoy should take some time to reevaluate like I have.
My wife and I ironed out my weakness and have since set up a great schedule in which we switch off days putting our daughter to bed. This gives us opportunity to have the best of both worlds and even opens up a little more time for “mommy and daddy” time at the end of the day which I’ll never make up an excuse to miss out on.
What are some ways that you and your spouse tackle bedtime together? Share with us in the comments below your techniques of working as a team!
Tyson is a contributing writer to Today’s the Best Day. He is a husband and father to two of the most beautiful girls on the planet. He loves, football, spending time with family and providing valuable content to help others have the best day every day.
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Danielle is the owner of Today's the Best Day. She strives to provide creative and uplifting content in order to enrich the parenting experience for women everywhere. Danielle hopes to help you and your family to make every day the best day! 
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